This weekend, we got rid of L’s pacifier in probably the most random way possible, which honestly kinda fits perfectly with who we are. Just to cut to the chase: we lied.
Let me go back to the beginning, that picture is L the second day of being in this world. Literally the day he was born, one of the nurses was like, usually if a baby isn’t breast-fed, they like the pacifier and popped one in. We didn’t really care, but that’s how his love story started: Day One. We used to have to clip his pacifier to him just so we weren’t constantly picking them up off the ground. But, around the time he turned one, we started limiting when he could use one. He could only use it when he was sleeping and on road trips. We also ended up taking one to daycare for naps.
I also need to add, for the context of this story, that he started calling it “Jeffrey” at around 20 months old. Why?! We literally have no idea. We have only ever called it a pacifier, so we’re thinking maybe he picked it up at daycare….. :::shrug::: Let me know if this sounds like a word you’ve heard before because we don’t know, BUT we eventually started calling it that too because if you can’t beat em’…
Okay, so on Friday night, we were having dinner together at the table. We recently put some pictures up and he pointed at one of them and said “Jeffrey.” Now, me being the Black mom that I am, I responded, “I threw all your Jeffreys away.” I mean, he’s almost two and we were going to cross that bridge eventually, but we hadn’t even talked about it recently. When we had talked about it before, we mentioned maybe doing the thing where you cut a tiny hole and then make it bigger and bigger until they’re over it because it’s broken. We definitely hadn’t said anything about telling him they were in the trash. I think I mostly said it because he is starting to remember things (e.g. me saying we’ll get cookies later) and to also be able to make connections, so I was just seeing how he’d take the news. He didn’t seem bothered, so we moved on in the conversation. When I was getting him ready for bed, he brought a Jeffrey up again, upon seeing his crib, and I reminded him that I’d thrown them away.
Thing is, I hadn’t. They were all in his crib. About six of them were just in his crib (remember the post about sleep training?) Anyway, B is in the kitchen hearing me say it again and asked if I want her to actually take them out. Since he still didn’t seem upset, I was like, eh…sure….let’s see what happens. She put them on our bedroom dresser. I did our routine as normal and when I was walking out of the room, he sat halfway up and looked at me confused. So I gently reminded him that we had thrown them away and told him I’d stay with him for a while. I rubbed his back for a few minutes and walked out before he fell asleep. Which he did, he went to sleep without it. The first time he woke up crying, B when in there and coaxed him back to sleep. The second time, at 3am, it was me and I was two seconds from just giving him his Jeffreys back haha. It wasn’t even like we had definitely decided to fight this battle!!! I’m tired!!
Anyway, he slept through the rest of the night and we got up around 8am on Saturday to plan for a trip to San Diego and he was still asleep, so we took our showers. While we were getting dressed, we were all wow, we did it, super random and that easily, who knew! Once he woke up, I went in there to get him ready for breakfast and I was all singing “Good morning, good morning, good morning to you!!” opening the blinds, etc etc. He’s giggling, jumping in his crib. Then, I look over at him, fully processing the situation, and immediately burst out laughing. I was like, “Langston! Where did you get that Jeffrey?!” He just smiled back. I don’t know when and I don’t know where, but he had found one. I picked him and calmly told him we had to thrown that one away too. I carried him to the kitchen, opened the trash can with my foot, he popped it out of his mouth, and dropped it in. I told him to say bye-bye and he solemnly said “Bye-bye Jeffrey.” B swears she checked for them really good, but obviously…not good enough haha.
Fast-forward to this road trip to San Diego where he had to be reminded several times that we threw away the Jeffreys (since he was allowed to have one on these types of trips before), which I think kind of helped us. He kept saying “Jeffrey in the trash?” Anyway, SATURDAY night, not Friday, we can definitively say that he made it through the night without a pacifier. Then he made it through his nap on Sunday afternoon without one also.
So, I really think it was just that easy. We just had to start with a lie to our kid on a random Friday night to get him to stop using his pacifier. Haha. I will say however, based on what I know about children, having him throw that one away on Saturday morning and the repeated reminder that he’d done so, is most likely clinched the deal though. But, it’s still funny how it all started.